Monday, 30 November 2020


Hello! It's been a while...again. I apparently am no good at balancing my life because as soon as things get busy or turn into utter shit like the whole of 2020 has done, I disappear again, my bad. Blogging has always been a hobby for me & unfortunately is always the first thing that gives when life gets a little hectic but I've decided to slowly pick it back up because it's a nice little bit of escapism to have which I think we all need sometimes! 

I almost don't know where to start, this year seems like its dragged & there's so much to mention but it's also flown by, it's been a weird one hasn't it? The main reason I stopped blogging is because I work in the NHS, so, as you can imagine, I didn't have an awful lot of free time or even free energy when this pandemic started & even less so as it went on but I've got to the point of needed something other than the bubble of COVID in my life as I'm sure many other people do too, so I'm going to have a little catch up of what's been going on & what I've been doing to find those little moments of joy.

Let's start with work shall we. I've worked in the NHS for around 6 years now but nothing could have prepared me for working through a pandemic. It's been eye opening, strange, heart breaking, scary, overwhelming, all the emotions but there's also been some really lovely moments, I'm really lucky with where I work as were such a strong team together, we're all very supportive of each other & that's just been a really nice environment to work in, specially with this looming over us but also the community that supports NHS staff has been amazing. We had all sorts of food delivered to us, specially from Gusto Lounge ,we had SO many laundry bags & mask supports made for us, we struggled to find sanitary wear so my sister Alice put out a plea for donations & we were absolutely inundated with products from so many brands including Wuka, OrganiCup, Lil-Lets & many more, which I then divided up & dropped off to wards around the hospital. So its been a whirlwind! 

Walks! Suddenly a little stroll became a necessity! I've always known there's some really lovely places to walk close to me but I've never really bothered, but along with the rest of the country it became a regular thing in my life over the last few months, although the shore front isn't as nice now it's chilly! My sister & I went on socially distanced walks regularly just blow the cobwebs off & destress from work, you'd often find us enjoying the sunsets. I also started to wander around parts of Southampton that aren't as busy usually like Old Town & the Old Walls which is a lovely walk as well as being surrounded in history.

SNACKS! I mean, who wasn't either ordering incredible treats to their doors or spending the time baking? I've got to admit, I think I baked once? I just prefer ready made treats for when you're feeling snacky. This incredible biscoff mallow filled egg is from Jackie at Whimsical Kitchen, the queen of marshmallow, I've also had cookies & blondies from her too, what she makes is just insane. I also ordered from some other small businesses which were doing brownie boxes & cookie ones too plus...Doughnut Time started doing nationwide deliveries so you bet I ordered from them too! Although I did share everything!

Who else ended up on zoom then? all of us? yep, thought so. I think this year has really needed that little bit of joy, so I, along with everyone else started to arrange weekly zoom quizzes & fun with friends, they were always a laugh but most importantly something to look forwards to. It was nice to be able to chat & catch up with different people over zoom & facetime as the amount of social media I was consuming slowly became overwhelming, its just a very frustrating place to be at the moment & I needed to remind myself that I am in control of what I consume & just turn that shit off.

Autumn! That came around all of a sudden didn't it? I honestly don't know whether I'm coming or going this year specially with all the updates & changes but I'll save that chat for another time. From the end of September I became quite unwell, it's still ongoing & being looked into but currently it a mystery as to what actually happened but I'm much better than I was, when it was at its worst I couldn't really do much at all or even get out of bed for very long, all my energy was gone, I was losing my balance, falling over & my whole body was constantly tremoring pretty much nonstop, so I had a few months of doing the bare minimum & feeling like an absolute slug.
Once things started to ease off a little bit I was able to go out for short while, as that's all I could manage, luckily some places were open & my sister got me out of the house a while here & there. But of course that included pumpkin picking plus we went super early so were the only people there!

If anything, this year has been very eye opening, you soon see what truly matters to you & what doesn't deserve your energy, we've all had to adapt to something we've never experienced before which has been a challenge in itself let alone adding other pressures on top of that, we've had to find coping mechanisms, different ways to channel our energy & there's no right or wrong way, it's just what works for you & as long as it's doing something positive for you, your body & your mindset then keep doing it.

So, after the biggest rabble from me, I'm just going to say, I hope you've found little moments of joy in these strange times & I will 100% be back for a ramble that makes zero sense again soon!
Emily-May x  

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